Love Languages, And Paring Down The Blogging Thing

How's that for a title? ;0)

First, I want to share about a fun thing we've been focusing on at home: love languages. It's nothing new, but the kids are old enough now that theirs are beginning to become obvious. Kendra's is touch, and Micah's looks to be gifts (and games, currently).

Everyone always asks if Micah's entrance into our fam has been a rough transition for Kendra, what with sibling rivalry and all. Our biggest transition issue has been too much love. I know that sounds impossible, but when your three year old likes to show and receive love with touch, and she LOVES LOVES LOVES her baby brother whose love language is not touch, well, you get the idea... ;0)

Not wanting to squelch her expressions of love for Micah, we have been teaching Kendra how to show him love in a way that's perfect for him. Gifts and games. Anyone can hand Micah anything--a dirty rock or a dirty sock will do--and he lights up like nobody's business. He just loves the sensation of being handed a "gift"! So when Kendra feels like smooching, patting, and hugging the life out of her little bro, we're training her to grab a toy and pass it to him instead, or play a game (like peek-a-boo) with him. (Of course we still let her show physical affection to him; we're just trying to help her dial it back a bit! ;0) )

This frequent discussion of love languages is also helping Kendra help us... Neither Corey or I are "touchers", and although we try to remember that Kendra's need for it is higher than we know and therefore try to give her lots of extra physical affection, we just forget. Since we've been talking more and more about love languages the last couple weeks, Kendra's getting good at saying, "I need a hug," or, "Can I sit with you on the couch?" It's great!

Now onto the "paring down the blogging thing" part: I started this lil' 'ol bloggity blog primarily as a means of journaling our adoption process. The adoption came and went, and here I'm still at it! I'd always wanted to journal, but never got it to stick. Somehow, this blogging thing works for me, though. Maybe it's the combination of text and pics. Maybe it's because I type faster than I write. Maybe it's because blogger dates it for me, so I have one less thing to do... but I digress.

I'm so glad I'll have the entries from Micah's adoption to print and share with him. I love being able to process my spiritual growth here and there, and share family events with my friends and family in one fell swoop that I can also print for us to keep. (I think I'm going to nix photo albums after 2008, and just print my family-related posts in a book each year.) I love being able to share photos of friends and family in one easy spot. There are lots of things I love about blogging, but I think I will love it even more if I pare it down a bit...

You see, I didn't realize what kind of a vortex this blog would open up! I've "met" all these wonderful fellow bloggers, and the whole comment loops/keeping up on reading blogs thing can really take on a life of its own--you know, a life that competes with the life God has given me to invest in my hubby and kids and home! I read a blog post today (ironic, I know!) that really helped me articulate why I've been feeling bogged down by my blog, and it inspired my decision to try closing my commenting boxes. If any of what I'm saying resonates with you, check it out: http://ebeth.typepad.com/reallearning/2008/07/i-was-a-better.html I do want you all to know how much I appreciate all the encouragement you've given me! I am so thankful to have so many kind, sweet sisters!! (And you few brothers, too! ;0) )

Hopefully this post can serve as some small apology to those of you I've "led on/let down". My love language is words of affirmation, and I never thought twice before "reciprocating" whenever someone left me a comment. In the last few months, I've been blog hopping less and less, and leaving even fewer comments, and I'm sure I've hurt some feelings. I apologize. It has nothing to do with a lessening of my love for you. It's simply that I've decided to spend less time in blog land.

A big part of that decision is due to my need for alone time, which energizes me. If I were keeping a pen and paper journal, I would be spending time alone, and I want to lean a little more toward that here. I'm thrilled to know that others are even remotely interested in the goings-on of my world, so I'll continue to post here; I'm just going to suspend the dialogue-generating/vortex-opening comment feature in the hopes that it will spare me the energy-zap of a big party. Not because big parties aren't fun; they are! They're just not energizing for me. And when I'm turning to the blog for some journal-esque, re-charging alone time, I'm hoping I'll get more of that sans comments. Think of it kind of like an author. You write the book alone, put it out there for any and all to enjoy, and probably don't get lots of feedback from readers. You just enjoy the cathartic process of creating the book. I sure hope all this makes sense!

Plus, on one quick practical note, I'm just terrible about getting back to people when they leave a question here on the blog, especially if it involves dates! I'm much better with e-mail for that, so hopefully this will help alleviate a few of my many lackings in correspondence graces.

Now maybe I'm making a mountain out of a molehill... I've never checked my stats, don't even know how, so maybe there's only one (or possibly even none) of you reading this. I have no clue how many people stop by here from time to time. Just like an author doesn't know how many people check out their book from the library, or how many people a used copy gets passed on to... okay, I'm done. Now I'm sure there are none of you reading anymore! ha ha! ...but I can't really be sure, because I've disabled the comments box... Okay, I'm really done. Really. ;0)